Exhale

The euphoria over 2.4 has died down and I've sobered up.

Am starting to regret not putting in more effort for econs and exercising better time-management during the test. But I guess its too late. I'll just go to a corner, pray that I get 3 measley marks for the DRQ section(minimum for a pass!) and try and be content with my E/D/C or whatever it is I've got under the A level system of grading.


Was thinking about certain issues for the past week. What drives me. What motivates me. What pushes me that extra mile. (Is this starting to sound like that disastrous scholarship interview? Nooooo)

I'm such a perfectionist (and that's not a good thing sometimes) Never noticed it till recently. And I guess I also didn't want to acknowledge that inherent part of me.
Thank you DISC personalilty test. I know I'm not really an ID personality type anymore.

Got back one of my essays today. Admitedly I didn't really put a whole lot of effort into it when I was writing it but I think the comments and the grade just still pissed me off a lot. Began complaining to the nearest person (as I always do) which happened to be John and sulked a little, but then realized later that my annoyance wasn't so much directed at the teacher who gave me that mark but more so myself that I didn't manage to meet up with whatever expected grade I had in mind.

And this is what I always do with my lousy assignments.
I skim past the comments. Fold it up. Throw it at the bottom of my file and refuse to look at it for the rest of the year. In the meantime I work even harder to make up for that one assignment.

Which is what I did for O level Lit last year. Didn't take a second look at my script for the disastrous RnJ passage-based test after I first saw the D. Had an inexplicable, deep aversion for consultation sessions with GWS, even though I probably would've benefited from it. Because I wanted to do it on my own.

Because I wanted to do it on my own. Because I had this stubborn conviction that I could.
And that mindset sometimes prevails even today.

Yet in the end, it worked. I'm still quite puzzled over it. Maybe it was a fluke. Maybe I'm just judging myself too harshly again. Whatever.

I was wondering if I could expect a similar miracle this year. Somehow I doubt it for a lot of reasons which I don't feel like stating now. But the gist of it is that I suppose I have to stop sweeping everything under the carpet and start being more open to criticism.

So. Shall begin by taking out that essay and try to see what went wrong and try to resist the urge to put it away. And then we'll do the same when I get back the econs test next week.

Whoopee.

posted by Jeanne @ 11:50 PM

Was thinking of bribing the timekeeper at first. Hanyang was offering $2 for every 10 seconds shaved off our 2.4 timing. But in the end....

I. PASSED. the stupid 2.4km run today!

I PASSED!

And I got a B!!


Thanks to KB for pushing me to run when I started to walk after the 5th round!! :D:D You saved me from a borderline C and a possible D!!

Mass PE will be full of GAMES from now on!!

(((Provided I pass the other 5 items butthat'snextweeksoidon'tcare!!!)))

*boingboingboing*

I think I might've failed the Econs DRQ test.

But.

I PASSED my 2.4!! And that's what matters for Now!

No more serious running for a year!!!!!

Temporary Bliss.

posted by Jeanne @ 10:28 PM

Went for the scholarship interview on Monday. Not good at all! Won't comment too much here but I think I wouldn't mind so much if I actually do get the rejection letter. But I still can't get over the fact that I caved in to a woman with bad eyeshadow who talked down to me like I was a kid >.<

Interesting geog lesson yesterday. Sir and John had an intense and fierce competition to see whose pencil box contained the most items.

Sir: *pulls out sweets* Hah, do you have this?
John: ...I have Listerine. *pulls out Listerine pocket pack*
Sir: *pulls out post-it pads* What about this??
John: Eh...I have a Swiss Army Knife. *pulls out knife*
Sir: *reaches in and out of pencil box* Handphone?
Blotter paper??
Tissue paper???
John: *pulls out a 1 dollar coin from his pencil case* Well I have the money to buy tissue paper.
Sir: *growing irritated* Paper clips???
John: Last time I had an entire sewing kit in my pencil case.
Sir: *pulls out the projector remote control* Well you don't have a remote control in your pencil case so forget it.
John: Darn. Well I still have more stationery than you. *pulls out all the pens he has* One....two....three....four....five....six....

And Mel and I are just sitting there laughing away.

And Kb is still making do without a pencil case after he left it in the LT 4 months ago. I don't know how he does it!

Playing captain's ball using the rugby ball is fun. But it transforms everyone into violent little things. Ian! You know my traumatic experience =p

posted by Jeanne @ 11:45 PM

My family and David (who was church visiting) wanted to watch Passion of the Christ after mass but I made the mistake of showing my face while we were purchasing the tickets. So we spent good Friday arguing with the Guy behind the counter at the cinema over my age.

Guy behind the counter: ....Is she 18?
Dad: *loudly* Yes of course she is! Isn't she? *looks around for support*
Guy: She doesn't look 18.
Dad: *louder still* Oh no but she is!
Guy: No she's not.
Dad: Tsk....Haiya, don't be like that la.

Did not get tickets for Passion in the end. >.<

So we underaged people went for Hellboy instead despite halfhearted protests from Ian that the title was inappropriate given the occasion. Killed the time we had before the movie by shopping for Easter Eggs with David at Cold Storage (for the cast and crew for Midsummer's) and watching Ian deliberately take 40 minutes to eat a small slice of chocolate cake (reasoning: "If everyone ate slowly the world would be a more peaceful place!"). Mmm.... :/ He still refuses to accept the fact that my mum thew away the orchids. Ian! (I know you read this) - Flowers die sometime.

Managed to finish Red Badge of Courage while sticking henna tattoos on myself at the Red Cross fair on Saturday. Its 158 pages about 2 days in the life of a loser who wants to be a war hero but gets hit over the head with a rifle instead. Never thought I'd say this but I prefer Edmund Hooper from King of the Castle even though he's such a sadist! Literature is strange.


The scholarship interview is slated for the Monday 2 weeks from now. Not sure what my answer will be if they ask stuff like why I deserve the scholarship or who my favourite author is. And don't think I will have time to prepare any halfway decent answers either! Was watching the Q&A section of the Miss Singapore Universe finals a couple of days ago; hah hopefully won't be faced with a similar scenario on Monday. The only good thing I suppose, is that I get to leave school early for it :D (!!) I find that I'm beginning to live for blue slips, recesses and public holidays. That can't be good though, I suppose, but oh well.

And in the end when all else fails there's Cable! Off to watch the Simpsons now. Ah. What would I do without it. Great altar of passive entertainment.

posted by Jeanne @ 7:52 PM

Joy!! This is the last day I'll ever have to set up the drama booth during recess to sell MSND tickets!! :D:D

ACSb has become drama's new headquarters for the whole week. Been heading down there after school with Michelle, Jacinta and Kelly to settle accounts with the cast and dance company and, since yesterday, taking half the day off school to make the necssary preparations for Midsummer Night's Dream. Caught bits of the rehearsals and the 2nd half of the play yesterday on opening night - it looks really good! :D Its times like this when everyone's hard work seems justified.

[....But I still need a day off to finish all the incomplete homework! >.<]

Heading down to Barker soon. Later.

posted by Jeanne @ 5:13 PM